All over the world, we are seeing what it’s like when people withdraw into their homes. Some are homeschooling and parenting, some working full or part time, some having to do both. Many have lost their jobs. Some are alone, some with roommates they may or may not know well, others with family. An unknown percentage are with abusers of one form or another. Globally, there’s a big step back and it’s affecting our mental health with many complaining about cabin fever and going stir-crazy. The good news is there are lots of resources online to help, from therapy to exercise. Obviously, it’s also affecting economies. I’m in the U.S. and we haven’t seen the worst of it yet.
You are seeing what a lot of us who have CPTSD, or are otherwise neurodiverse, have known most of our lives. When you have the stigma against mental health along with child sexual abuse, sexual assault, and other traumas, some of your brightest and most gifted citizens are sidelined. For some of us, it is through self-isolation from anxiety, a flight/flight/freeze response essentially stuck in the On position, and fear. I’ve been in DBSA rooms and seen people under-treated or unable to get adequate treatment. They are neurodiverse and they are also brilliant. We could use their gifts, their observations, and wisdom. Not to mention what Andrew Cuomo said Tuesday in his briefing: this is not who we are – we need to value every single life, regardless of whether they can contribute to a way deemed economically useful. Every single person has inherent value. Or they should in a compassionate and just society. As Americans, we are a ways off from that. We can talk a good game, but we don’t back it up with real care. Trillions was not a problem to bail out companies, but with regard to making a real difference to the neurodiverse, the damaged, the chronically ill, the disabled, it was seen as too much money. State disability payments are far too difficult to get for the neurodiverse. You have to have the fortitude to fight three, four, five times over. Judges, politicians, and many doctors lack understanding about the aftereffects of trauma, of the debilitating effects of depression, of what happens – including the structural changes in the young developing brain – when you are utterly demoralized as a child.
We have the opportunity to make real changes in ourselves and our communities. But we must get dark money out of politics and embrace the values of empathy and compassion, to live up to the values we espouse. As Ed Fong writes in How The Pandemic Will End, “One could also envisage a future in which America learns a different lesson. A communal spirit, ironically born through social distancing, causes people to turn outward, to neighbors both foreign and domestic.” We’ve been given a timeout, a pause. We can come back better for it.